Love means ALWAYS having to say you’re sorry

9 Oct

“Oh Lord,” I say, “I know you’re on my side here. Why is he being so stubborn? I really miss his friendship.”

Then tell him that, and say you’re sorry.

“But I have nothing to be sorry for. He started it. He never apologizes. If I apologize, I’m saying it’s ok for him to keep doing this.”

So, you think that by staying angry, you’re going to make him sorry? Isn’t that somewhat manipulative?

“Well, when you put it like that, maybe. But I don’t know what else to do. I just want him to acknowledge that he hurt me.”

Then write him a letter. Say you’re sorry.

“For what?”

You’ll think of something.

I stare at the paper, too angry to write. I won’t be a hypocrite.
But I can picture Jesus, one eyebrow raised as He waits.

“Fine. I’ll do it. But just to get you to stop nagging.”

I grab my pen and scrawl, “Dear Friend, I’m sorry you’re so stubborn…”

Hey now! That’s not the way I taught you.

“At least it would wake him up. I’ve got nothing else.”

Nothing? Well for starters, you could apologize for trying to be me.

What do you mean?

Last time I checked, it was my job to change people.

My sarcasm gets the best of me, and before I know it, I sputter out an ace of a retort.

“Well, Lord, I don’t see you changing anyone.”

Haven’t I though? What are you thinking right now?

I refuse to answer. Instead, I fold my arms across my chest. I really hate it when He’s smug.

Come on, He coaxes. You know you want to.

He’s referring to a quote by some anonymous author that I have pasted on my FaceBook page. It makes me smile. He used my own words against me.

“I can’t believe you went there,” I say.

Nevertheless, it’s a favorite, so the words just flow through my mind…

“God grant me the serenity
to accept those I cannot change,
the courage to change the one I can,
and the wisdom to know it’s me.”

He grins, and points back to the paper.

I know He’s right. I know it’s the only way. There’s only one part of my life I can control—my own actions.

I pick up my pen and start again.

“Dear friend, I’m sorry I treated you so badly. I love you and I miss our friendship.”

Just writing the words, I feel release.

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